Stories by Alan Guebert

A sap shouting into the hurricane

Thursday, April 3, 2008

Today’s barely functioning cash grain and livestock markets will soon be getting their price signals from the world’s largest single, for-profit, around-the-clock money, grain, meat and metals futures trading operation.

A sap shouting into the hurricane

Thursday, April 3, 2008

One fine spring evening 35 or so years ago, I rang the doorbell of the home of the young lady I intended to ask to a high school dance. After a short pause, the front door opened to frame her father, his bare feet and a can of refreshment in the doorway. Momentarily stunned at […]

Government playing the patsy again

Thursday, March 27, 2008

If either you or I get in a high-stakes poker game and we lose our shirts, an absolute certain bet is that the government will not bail us out.

Food inspection a big, germy joke

Thursday, March 20, 2008

When a former National Football League player known for his dirty play was asked if he ever “threw” a game — purposely helped the opposing team win — the player replied by stating the obvious.

Farm and Food File: I must confess: I don’t have a clue

Thursday, March 13, 2008

A furrowed brow and clenched teeth usually accompany the phrases “Officer, you’re right,” and “I don’t know.” The former hasn’t split my lips since, oh, probably 1974, but the latter is quickly becoming a staple of daily conversations with farmers and ranchers emailing or telephoning to ask how long today’s grain and land markets can […]

Farm and Food File: Time is money and money corrupts

Thursday, March 6, 2008

History doesn’t record who first uttered the ageless business maxim that “Time is money,” but a good bet might be a meatpacker because minutes and hours, like cattle and hogs, are valuable commodities under constant assault by packers. As such, the most efficient packer — or, as they say in the business, the one that […]

Farm bill discussions are ‘ridiculous’

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Be it bird hunting in Minnesota or vote hunting on Capitol Hill, House Agriculture Committee Chairman Collin Peterson is seen as a straight shooter of both pheasants and fools.

Bull and bear get piggish competition

Thursday, January 24, 2008

An unwritten motto of a former employer, market adviser Professional Farmers of America, was that it’s easier to turn journalists into economists than economists into journalists.

Brother, can you spare a dime?

Thursday, January 17, 2008

One of the oldest truisms in agriculture noted that “when farmers make money, everybody in town makes money.

Happy cotton pickin’ New Year

Thursday, January 10, 2008

While other prophets and forecasters fill the first week of January – and endless inches of newspaper space – with predictions of what will happen this year, permit me 600 or so words to predict what won’t happen in 2008.


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About Alan

Alan Guebert was raised on an 800-acre, 100-cow southern Illinois dairy farm. After graduation from the University of Illinois in 1980, he served as a writer and editor at Professional Farmers of America, Successful Farming magazine and Farm Journal magazine. His syndicated agricultural column, The Farm and Food File, began in June, 1993, and now appears weekly in more than 70 publications throughout the U.S. and Canada. He and spouse Catherine, a social worker, have two adult children.