Seems we always find religion when we are standing on the brakes. All I could think — and say aloud — as we skidded, squealing tires, seat-belt constricting my heart, which seemed poised to leap out of my chest, was “oh God! Oh God! Oh God!”
When I get too caught up in the running, buying, doing and utter delight we all seem to take in exclaiming the “stress” of the holiday season (“So much to do! So much to do!” Like the White Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland forever late for a very important date) I take a deep breath [...]
I had no idea people harbored such hate for Christmas music. Show me someone who thrills to Silent Night and I’ll show you six more who swear they will poke out their own eardrums with a drum stick if they have to hear The Little Drummer Boy one more time.
Nature abhors a vacuum. Nature also abhors my getting a moment’s peace. Nature, in fact, has made somewhat a game of keeping me on edge pretty much all of the time. Just when we could happily put the cap on a bat-free year, the mice have arrived to fill the void. Visitors It has become [...]
She was visibly uncomfortable with the squirming toddler on her lap. She proffered snacks, and a pencil and paper to the little guy while attempting to slide him, ever so gently to the side. Then she apologized. Over and Over again.
This is my thanks? This is how a member of the mouse nation repays my kindness to one of his flock? A sneak attack on me when I am most vulnerable?
I am what you might call a cheapskate. Actually, no might about it. I am cheap. Definitely. It’s not that I won’t spend money. I just won’t spend much money. I am just absolutely sure that nothing should cost more than a dime. I can never get over how much the electric utility charge me. [...]
Because we have been working on this old house or another for the last 70 billion years someone will occasionally ask me why I don’t write a do-it-yourself guide on home improvement. Why? Because most people can manage to screw up their home improvement projects all by their own selves, thank you very much. Patience [...]
Previously, I was pretty sure that Mr. Wonderful was my Knight in Shining Armor. I know in my heart he’d give up a kidney if I needed one. Then I asked if I could have a wee bit of parking space in his garage and all bets were off.
I realize that in light of tragedies such as war, famine and natural disaster, losing three convenience appliances in the space of three days is a First World Problem to have, but that doesn’t mean I have to be happy about it.