There is a point in life when you realize that you never do, in fact, outgrow high school. Worse, you never really get over junior high.
We sent the baby off to “middle school” this year. In my day, middle school (AKA junior high) didn’t start until seventh grade. Today it starts in fifth grade. […]
How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two: One to screw it almost all the way in and the other to give it a surprising twist at the end.
How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?
We’ve formed a task force to study the problem […]
As we tally the final numbers at summer’s end, we find that with the arrival of cooler weather goes what little hope we had that this would be the year of our greatest garden yet.
This should come as no surprise since we haven’t had any luck whatsoever with a garden before.
This year was […]
I don’t, as a rule, look to celebrities to serve as role models for my children. I’m not generally on the lookout for anyone to teach my children how to get arrested for a heroin possession or soliciting, and I have rarely had need for anyone to teach my kids how to lie, cheat or […]
I used to think the four sweetest words in the English language were “Will you marry me?” or “It’s a healthy boy!” (Or girl). These days “The roofers are here” is running a close third.
When we bought this old house it had a new roof. That selling point alone should have alerted us that […]
There are any number of reasons why I will never be crowned Mother of the Year, but the truth is, I removed myself from the running early on.
When the children were babies Mr. Wonderful worked nights. As a result, I spent many long, hot, afternoons sitting alone with them in the yard, playing in […]
Having appeared in print for years now, you would think I would have both a deep understanding and an acquired immunity to the craziness that come over people when it comes to seeing their name in print.
Alas, you would be wrong.
Quite by accident and through no fault of my own I became embroiled […]
The danger of writing about your life, yourself and your family is that you are always in grave danger of becoming one of “those moms.” You know the ones.
Your children are always beautiful, brilliant, gifted. Maybe Garrison Keillor can get away with that when writing about Lake Woebegone, but here in the real world […]
Some folks have the house on the block where all the kids play. I have the house on the block where people send their children to find out how good their health insurance really is.
Ours, I am told, is a “fun house.” Not in the literal sense of mazes and crazy mirrors (although, come to […]
It is clear that despite my long-standing personal “hands off” policy toward nature, I am destined to go down in history as one of those people forever identified with a certain species of animal.
Jane Goodall had her chimps. Steve Irwin had his crocodiles. Me, I have bats. Oh, I don’t want to have bats […]
