Our son, at 12, is back from the wild. He has returned from a week at Boy Scout camp. He went off with big plans, a big grin and a “Class A” uniform thrown over his shoulder. I waved good-bye until the van was just a dot in the distance. Forms The decision to send [...]
Ah June — the hum of valedictory speeches is in the air and mortarboards take flight. We have been invited to celebrate this auspicious milestone with a number of high school graduates this year. Mixed feelings I imagine the parents of all these high school graduates are both thrilled and somewhat confused. Where is that [...]
One of the many charming aspects of living in an old house is that you are never truly alone. Never alone Oh sure, I might be the only HUMAN at home, the dogs outside and the cat ignoring me, but I have the sense that I am never really without companions. Once or twice a [...]
‘Tis June — the season when wedding invitations flourish and everyone gets busy pledging forever, in sickness, and ’til death do us part. Since there is nothing young married folk love more than unsolicited advice (unless it is the question that pops up within minutes of the ceremony: “So when are you two going to [...]
I knew that fatherhood had irreversibly changed him when Mr. Need for Speed drove at turtle’s pace hunched over the steering wheel, eyes scanning the horizon for any real or perceived danger to our newborn baby on his maiden voyage from hospital to home. A motocross racer whose favorite motto was “it’s not the speed [...]
You just never think it will happen to you. Then, one day you are caught. Transfixed. A deer in the headlights. You stare in horror as comprehension (and a wrinkle) slowly dawns. You are aging. If there is anything to be learned from growing older it is that we really do remain young at heart [...]
I think what keeps you young is learning a little something new about yourself as you age. I, for example, have discovered my inner four-year-old (boy). I am a construction junkie. Behemoth of a building I came by this knowledge quite by accident. For many years now I have begun many workdays staring at the [...]
Nowadays, I not only take my calculator along on grocery shopping trips (the better to ascertain if we can or cannot afford to eat again this week), but I probably should take a magnifying glass along too. I don’t mean to alarm anyone unnecessarily, but our food appears to be shrinking. Granted, most would agree [...]
First, I would like to thank the editor of this fine publication for my latest existential crisis. They cooked up that heartwarming “Thanks, Mom!” contest last week. I really thought I had that one in the bag. I like to think I’m a pretty great mom. I’m there every day before school, after school, heck [...]
I want to be physically fit. I really do. It’s just that it takes so much time. And effort. And commitment. There is only so much time in the day, after all, and I have to pencil in parenting, cooking, cleaning, laundry, running errands and the like. That barely leaves any time at all to [...]
I suspect that civilization, as a whole, took a nosedive the very moment people started trying to reason with children. Children are, by nature, unreasonable. Children are basically egos with lungs and legs. Nonetheless, modern parents seem to spend an inordinate amount of time trying to coax, cajole and downright beg their progeny to “please, [...]
The moment you have a baby, people who are “experts” in the care and handling of infants become utterly convinced that if not taught properly how to hold your child you will, in fact, drop it. Sane, rational adults will caution you to “Watch his head!,” as if only their careful tutelage is what prevents [...]
It is said that murderers often return to the scene of their crimes. This is utterly believable to me. I’ve been returning to the same spot in our backyard garden annually for years now, despite the carnage I inevitably leave in my wake. Innocent Some may recall that my first innocent victim, gardening wise, was [...]
I am an ironic dinosaur, career-wise. I began my writing on the Internet when I discovered, quite by happy accident, that some kind souls would actually pay me to do what I would happily have done for free at the time. In the early days of the Internet, public “message boards” allowed anyone with dial-up [...]
If I had any doubt at all that modern life has made me soft and slack, all it took was my love affair with our DVR (Digital Video Recorder) to convince me that it is so. I’ll be thoroughly modern and immediately claim that this is not really my fault. Had I been born in [...]
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. – Elizabeth Stone The collision seemed to happen — as these things always do — in excruciatingly slow motion. In a burst of reckless speed, a sudden swerve and then the [...]
Pretty much every crazy idea Mr. Wonderful and I have ever had probably started with a measuring tape. One moment we are sitting around, happy as clams and not bothering a soul — least of all ourselves. The next, one of us is poking around and spouting crazy talk such as “I was thinking …” [...]
If you spend your life trying to impress and keep up with everyone else, you are not living your own life — you are living theirs. – Unknown Like most couples Mr. Wonderful and I certainly had our “salad days.” We lived on love and not much else. Back then, our financial discussions would go [...]
I would like to state for the record that I am not now, nor have I ever been, even a little bit insane. At least I don’t think so. Apparently, if you were raised an only child, as I was, that needs clarifying these days. It has recently come to my attention, thanks to “Octuplet [...]
It’s been a few years, but I’m fairly certain I taught my son to speak. I have a dim recollection of spending many happy afternoons coaxing his sweet baby-self to say, “Mama! Ma-ma! You can do it Sweetie, Mama!,” only to thrill to that blessed, blissful day when he cracked a wide, gummy grin and [...]