Our sixth-grade son, Wonderboy, has gone to camp. Camp being yet another thing the school district cooked up specifically to test me.
Much like the whole “Fifth graders totally belong in middle school with big giant huge children who look like they eat fifth graders for mid-morning snack!”
They have helpfully decided that in sixth grade, […]
The best thing about the writing life is, of course, the commute — mainly that there isn’t one. I work from home. I can, if I choose, work in my bathrobe.
The only problem with “being my own boss” so to speak is that I have such a close, personal relationship with my employee (also […]
It is often said that every boy should have a dog. That does sound nice. What I truly believe, however, is that every boy — and girl — should definitely have a barn.
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The first barn I vividly remember is my grandmother’s barn. It is the quintessential “big red barn.”
The lower level featured horse […]
Remember when the news was newsworthy?
News, of course, is anything you learn that you didn’t know before. Using that definition almost anything is technically “news” if it’s new to you.
Researchers at Georgetown University, for example, found that caterpillars can “shoot” their feces a distance of 40 times their body length. See there? News! Is […]
There is a point in life when you realize that you never do, in fact, outgrow high school. Worse, you never really get over junior high.
We sent the baby off to “middle school” this year. In my day, middle school (AKA junior high) didn’t start until seventh grade. Today it starts in fifth grade. […]
How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two: One to screw it almost all the way in and the other to give it a surprising twist at the end.
How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?
We’ve formed a task force to study the problem […]
As we tally the final numbers at summer’s end, we find that with the arrival of cooler weather goes what little hope we had that this would be the year of our greatest garden yet.
This should come as no surprise since we haven’t had any luck whatsoever with a garden before.
This year was […]
I don’t, as a rule, look to celebrities to serve as role models for my children. I’m not generally on the lookout for anyone to teach my children how to get arrested for a heroin possession or soliciting, and I have rarely had need for anyone to teach my kids how to lie, cheat or […]
I used to think the four sweetest words in the English language were “Will you marry me?” or “It’s a healthy boy!” (Or girl). These days “The roofers are here” is running a close third.
When we bought this old house it had a new roof. That selling point alone should have alerted us that […]
There are any number of reasons why I will never be crowned Mother of the Year, but the truth is, I removed myself from the running early on.
When the children were babies Mr. Wonderful worked nights. As a result, I spent many long, hot, afternoons sitting alone with them in the yard, playing in […]
