“Thirty-five-year-old married father of one decides to move out of his grandmother’s house and vows to give up his allowance. The planet’s population goes wild.”
In virtually any other family, if a middle-aged couple with a kid finally moved out of their grandmother’s house and thought about getting a job, people would be thrilled. It’s just shocking to me how personally so many people across the globe took the news that Harry and Meghan were running away from home.
In case you have been cut-off from all media and communication (lucky you) Prince Harry of England, Sussex and Two Bird and a Biscuit on the Thames (or some such title) and his wife, Meghan, she’s-American-so-we-hate-her-on-principle-Markle, have announced that they would like to get a place in Canada and focus on their young son.
Look, I get it, the media needs to manufacture drama to remain relevant. Apparently, all of this actual adulting by two middle-aged adults is seen as an International Act of Treason?
- Cutting the apron strings? Check.
- Cleaving to each other? Check.
- Seeing to their childcare needs so Queen Liz isn’t on the hook stuck babysitting every Saturday night and missing a good binge watch of The Crown? Check.
I am not a “royal follower” or fan or whatever one calls the people who are really into England’s Royal family. The Royals seem like lovely people. They certainly photograph well. They are all clean, well-dressed, and their children are adorable.
I hope things are safe and sound for them. I just don’t know all that much about them. I am particularly sure that I do not know the ins and outs of Meghan and Harry’s marriage.
Frankly, I’m too busy focusing on my own marriage and family to worry too much about theirs. Sorry Megs.
Our own family
Granted we aren’t royal (except in our minds), but when Mr. Wonderful and I wed and started a family, we moved out and on — not because our families aren’t awesome, loving, wonderful and all the adjectives the alphabet has to offer.
We moved because we wanted to start our lives together on our own. It honestly never occurred to us that living at home with our parents into our 30s with a family was a viable lifestyle option.
We are very close to our family members. Our grandparents are key people in our lives. That notwithstanding, I can’t imagine if my grandmother had final say in every major decision I made. While I care for my grandmother, I do not want her input on baby names, my career, what to eat, wear, do, say, and more.
Finally, they are parents now. Any new parent knows that learning to make boundaries for what works for you and your little one is crucial to survival. It starts with criticizing you for not putting a hat on the baby and ends with your being vilified on two continents for not asking your grandmother for permission to visit Canada.
All kidding aside, poor Harry also has a unique view most of us do not (thank you Lord). He lost his mother to that media circus. For Harry, after the media scrutiny during his parents’ marriage, the affairs, the divorce that followed, and how the media hounded his mother even in death must surely remain in his memory today. I can only applaud this preemptive strike to protect his family.
As we close engagement season (Christmas) and move toward wedding season (June), the biggest lesson to be found in what has been quickly been dubbed “#Megxit” by the media (Brexit? Get it? — that media, such cards they are) is that we need to stop thinking of marriage as bringing two (sometimes dysfunctional) families together.
While marriage does unite family trees, and family certainly matters, we must let marriage be a creation of a new family, new tradition. New legacy.
All of this is to say that boundaries are healthy and good, be they personal, professional, relationship, marital, or Canadian in nature.
- Make your own choices.
- Make your own decisions.
- Make your own living.
- Make your own way.
- Make your way to a Realtor so you aren’t’ living with your Gram at 35-years-old.
Of course, there is always the chance that the move will turn into Another media circus for Harry and Meg. Maybe one cannot simply “quit” being a celebrity? If that proves true, then they may just be establishing the North American branch of the British Royal family.
All I can say is that if this knocks the Kardashians off the media’s celebrity radar, I don’t hate the idea.
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